Frypan
There has been a development in the quality of cleaning in our apartment. It's gone from poor, to none! Yes, that's right, let's just bung the dirty utensils back into the cupboard! No one will notice!
I got up yesterday after a decent sleep in and thought 'a big breakfast would be a great start to the day'. So I start chopping up some bacon and tomatos, mushrooms and the like, but when I pulled out the frypan out of the cupboard, it was caked in fat from my flatmate's previous meal. What kind of fucktard does this?
Today's reason my flatmate pisses me off;
She has now started to replace cooking utensils completely uncleaned.
posted at 16:29
47 Comments:
I think you shd get rid of her!!!!
Ugh...That's just unsanitary. I hope you guys don't live somewhere where mice are a problem. Her laziness and lack of courtesy and common sense could lead to even bigger problems than dirty dishes. I half hope that it does, because then she would see that her actions have repercussions that she might not want to deal with. I've been reading your blog for about a week now, and it reminds me of how right I was to insist on living alone when I moved away to school.
I've never lived with someone else as I am still in high school, but your blog is slightly amusing. But there's just something about it I can't get... oh well. Funny stuff.
OMG!! I started reading and then only found out your housemate is a girl in the last line!! For some reason that makes it even more horrible!!!
I am the proud author of "Things I hate about my roommate." I was surprised to see a blog like yours, that is so similar both in title and in style to mine. So I was wondering when you started doing your blog? I only ask because you have no profile, no identity, no information, not even any archives. Trust me, as a person who writes about the person they live with, that you can give us some more information. If your flatmate is as bad as she sounds, she will be too stupid to figure it out anyway.
Visit http://thingsihateaboutmyroommate.blogspot.com/
I'm sorry you have a crappy roomate. I live in grad student housing my roomates and I get on ok howevr my room roomate is just a clutter which can be fustrating considering I'm a neat person anyhow you really need to start throwing a fit or somthing thats quite unsanitary staff infections are common in that type of envierment please be safe
Roz
Get your own stuff and keep it locked out of her way. That's how we used to survive in student digs.
Perhaps you should get the locks changed while she's out one day?
Cakesniffers Beware!
www.lolwtfdude.blogspot.com
but you're much much better!
I'd like to interview you for Famous Bloggers. If you are interested, write to me at famousbloggers@gmail.com.
I feel your pain. I once lived with a slob and it was a daily struggle not to kill them for being so nasty and stupid.
Set it on her bed with a note, "Please clean." If you say please, you're being polite, right? :)
If it's YOUR stuff, KEEP IT IN YOUR ROOM. Don't let her use ANYTHING of your's. Then it's her mess and you'd just have to move it out of the way.
this is just a test
this is great - I think you're living with my former flatmate!
My ex flatmate wrote us nasty notes when we don't make her coffee in the morning, lied to us about utility bills, canceled electricity without telling us, requested the post office to hold our mail after she moved out, too chicken to confront us (because she got caught with fraud) and sent her dad and brother-in-law showing up at our door, tells her cat that she wanted to suck its butt and then walks around half butt naked telling me that any man who doesn't want to f*** her is gay (which was about every man out there)...
I think your flatmate has discovered this site! She deliberately left the greasy frypan as she knew you couldn't help but write about it.
On second thought she probably has read your blog and never suspected it's about her.
I agree with sierrabella. I think she is now doing this to piss you off. I am sorry to say that I find it all a bit humorous. Good luck. I hope you win the lottery and then never have to have a roommate again. *snerk*
what you do is take one of those dirty knives and plunge it into your flatmates heart. then you will have a new set of playmates to grump about.
BUWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
HAHHAHHAHAHH
AHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAH
HAHAHA
AHAHHA
HAA
HA!!!!!
Oh my gawd!seriously!That is so disgusting, i feel really lucky to be living with people who have Armpit odor problems..
And fucktard is the best word to describe her alright.
But i would be so dissappointed if all this was a scam...
It's all too carefully laid out if you ask me...
From the images post structure to the images, it's all just too damned good...
Even though i feel really sorry for you, i think it would be even sadder if all this werent true...
You have a lot of followers who actually feel your pain!
And if this is just some pre-planned recipe for making people laugh, you have been successful at decieving everybody...
But at any consolation, i think many of us have learned a lot from your posts. So thankyou for that!
The secret to the flatmate is simple, complaining is in a blog or otherwise is a futile exercise, I found this out the hard way. Find what the flatmate loves the most and help it come up missing. In my case, it was her dog, unfortunately I liked the dog too, so the dog was off limits. Next, her Lara Croft life like figurine, with strap-on gun holster -- I held Angelina Jolie hostage for two months, before she got the damn thing back. A smile always comes to my face when I think about the utter torture I put that woman through over that ridiculous doll. Payment in full for being a shitty flatmate.
Fucktard, I just can't get over it. I don't know why. I don't think there is anything passive agressive about your blog. I try not to read into it when I read it.
First of all, I'd like to say that this is a great blog! Very well done!
On the other hand, your situation, frankly, sucks. Pouring out on this blog ain't enough stress release, methinks.
I think it's time to teach your roommate to co-exist with you all, else, boot her out. Besides, you gotta boot her out 'coz she's ruining the harmony in your flat.
But I gotta admit, if you didn't have that flatmate, we won't be seeing this ironically funny blog. =)
This site is a source of inspiration. The stories of apathy, lethargy, and complete slobbery are nothing short of hilarious. We all have known, or will know, these incompatibles, but few ever put it into such concise terms nor accompany it with graphic art, funny in its own right.
Just a thought, has your picture provider ever thought of marketing these images as postcards or tee shirts, like the kind found at a store such as Newbury Comics?
This site is a source of inspiration. The stories of apathy, lethargy, and complete slobbery are nothing short of hilarious. We all have known, or will know, these incompatibles, but few ever put it into such concise terms nor accompany it with graphic art, funny in its own right.
Just a thought, has your picture provider ever thought of marketing these images as postcards or tee shirts, like the kind found at a store like Newbury Comics?
Have you considered submitting this material to a network as a sit-com? It's much, much more funny than the things on TV!
She is such a vile fuckstick! I have lived in a dorm before where the girls just leave dishes for up to one week and stunk the whole dorm out along the corridor. But to leave filthy dishes IN the cupboard is truly horrid. You should use her bedsheets to clean out the frypan.
Why does gender or sexual orientation matter, soon 2 be?
Frankly, I find all of your 'reasons' vaguely sexist and/or prejudiced.
I think this is a sharp, witty blog, and enjoy the clean design and quirky pictures, and I respect the author's desire for anonymity, though thank you for answering those common questions.
Just a little curious about who you are. Are you an "adventist" as u took off on saturday. Missed your post... that day...
I feel with you.
Had I known about Blogger last year I wouls have done the same about my roommate (I live along this year).
My Roommate was just bad, around christmas time I was cleaning the whole room before I went back home and I found french fries on his side of the room, God knows how long thats been there. I really feel you. Good luck with your flatmates.
Ewwwww! That's so gross! My flatmates used to use my plastic Ikea cups to put out their cigarettes; drinking water was unbearable (smelled like smoke and plastic-yuck!), and there was no way of getting rid of the smell. So now I've labeled all of my stuff (including utensils, the new cups, dishes and food containers!), put it all in one place (labeled the cupboard too), and wrote "DO NOT TOUCH!" on it! HA! That showed them!!!!
Ew.
My roommate last year would leave 5 open bags of chips around the room (and sometimes open jars of queso to match,) and mine this year often have piles of plates on their desks, but nothing they do compares to putting dirty cookware back in the drawer. No matter how slovenly my roommates have been, they've NEVER done that.
Next time your flatmate says she has a headache, offer her a gun.
This blog is such a waste of time...
Ok, that is just gross!! How in the heck would somone even explain why they would not clean a frying pan after they used it. For one, that can attract roaches and other bugs that love the taste of dirty dishes, and take it from someone that knows it takes a LONG TIME to get rid of bugs once they are in the house. Also, not to mention that if had sat there long enough it can ruin the pan and you would have to get another one. I think its time to tell your flatmate to hit the road! You just need to get another person to live with, this is way beyond out of hand.
Wow, I feel so sorry for you. It is really good to hear though that it is not just me the things are happening to!
I also think that fucktard is an amazing word, one of the most satisfying of all curses and insults.
Terrific post.
I want to respond to the person who said that a female wouldn't say 'fucktard'. Well, I've been a female since my birth over 4 decades ago, and if I'd known the word, I'd have said it with great frequency! Bridget Jones says 'fuckwit', which is pretty close...
I agree: "Fucktard" is a very humourous expression and if I had thought of it I would have used it myself.
The giveaway (for me) that the author of this blog is male is the in-depth analysis of the recycling process, what gets recycled and how it gets recycled.
Yup!
Anywho-- I laughed so hard I cried when I read the frypan entry. I hope you never move out.
you should slap her
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Absolutely hilarious, if I didn't know any better I would think that you were referring to my housemates. I am still trying to kill mine with kindness in a vain attemp that they will understand that the dirty dishes belong in the dishwasher, not the cabinets. If you find a great solution, please pass it on.
Woooo, She is just plain sick in the head. Putting all those things back dirty.. Does she do drugs??
Don't you think that maybe it says something for you that you let her get away with all of these disgusting things? Kind of like the saying, "Shame on you if you fool me once, shame on ME if you fool me twice".
Foul. Living with roommates is always a bummmer... at least she doesn't sun-bathe naked in the living room... and bring her unfinsihed martini's into her car and drive off, oh yeah and steal your things, have her b-frned piss in the sink when the bathroom is in use... oh the list goes on.. but I feel your pain.
It's the flatmate dietyou end up so repelled by the old food that you forget that you were hungry in the first place. brilliant!
As a Princess, in my kingdom your flatmate would be forced outdoors, into the woods and taken out only to entertain the common people of the village when the court jester is too busy. Honestly, why move out? Make a shoot and slide her out the window in her sleep.
My friend directed me here because my flatmate could be your flatmate. At least the utensils go back where they belong, dirty or not. My roommate throws them out.
kill her and hide her body in the trash, problem solved. Next time you have a problem kill it, him, her or whatever. If in the unlikely killing doesn't work, kill yourself, how could 2 million japanese be wrong?
Grow up and stop being so mardie, you gotta a choice if you hate this hell so much just leave the house. Bet she aint half as bad as you say.
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