Freqently Asked Questions
This is in response to the comment "Since so many people are reading your blog, you could at least take the time to answer some of their questions."
Yes, you are right.
1. "JUST ONE QUESTION? ARE YOU A GUY OR A GIRL? SOME PEOPLE HAVE CALLED YOU GIRL AND OTHERS GUY. WHICH ONE ARE YOU?"
I post in anonymity for my protection. It doesn't really matter if you think I'm a guy or a girl.
2. "Flatmates? In the plural? I thought you only had one."
I live with three girls, however there is one in particular that is the problem.
3. "Great page... Even Better pics... where do you find them?"
All images are created by a friend who is a graphic designer. They too wish to stay anonymous.
4. "instead of posting all your ailments about your flatmate why dont you confront her?"
I have. Each and every one of these posts has been already been brought up with my flatmate
.
5. "Perhaps you should get your own place. Ever think of that, genuis?"
Yes, every day.
6. "John Doe -- your shagging her, aren't you? Just admit it -- you're in the sack, giving her a good rogering and then get online, and whinge about how she sings to you."
If only life were like that. There is no sexual relationship here, and there is no sexual tension. I could not think of a more repulsive act in the world than to have sex with my flatmate.
posted at 14:40
70 Comments:
I just found this blog recently, and I am hooked. I don't know or care if you are male or female. You (and your friend the graphic designer) should write a book. I just wish there were a way to read all previous posts so I could get the whole story. This is a great way to get out the frustration of living with this woman without resorting to desperate measures.
If you're going to correct someone's spelling, do it right! It's "spelled" not "spelt."
Well, "Being the perfect lady" is a good gender give away. Or is it simply misdirection? Maybe you are living the "Three's Company" lifestyle.
But I love this blog. Well written nuggets, with cool graphics. Well Done.
I believe the word spelt is correct.
With a blog like this you got to be prepared to take some smoke.. Really Just means we all love you ;o)
Bob the Gallery Blogger
Excellent blog; great pictures!
Be honest, though. You're actually a 35-year-old mom of 3, kids are off at school every day, and so this is your creative outlet, right? ;o)
Great blog. I believe the "spelt" vs "spelled" issue has to do with the side of the Atlantic where you were raised.
I love that the people who take the time to seek out this blog are geeky enough to argue over spelling. My personal favorite is the always-clever "your" vs "you're" which has more to do with the angle of your face to your desk in grade school than with your perspective on the Atlantic Ocean.
If there was ever a perfect way of giving way to one's frustration, this is it. I hope your blog does go down in the annals (spelt the same on both sides of the atlantic) of blogging as the most famous one ever.
omg. wat? u left sch when u finished grade 1? both can be used u moron. go read up before u leave any comments.
I'm loving this blog. Found it just before it got put up as a Blogger Favouritre or whaterever it is.
Living with a bunch of wanks who need major attitude adjustments, I see where your coming from. Hope you get it sorted it. Anyway, great reading, amazing blog :)
Shambo
Nice blogs....can I see previous posts please...
Excellent blog. I agree this is book material. It's good for you to get those frustrations out before something bad happens. Are you familiar with the term "going postal" or is that just an American phenomenon?
THANKS FOR ANSWERING MY QUESTION ON BEING MALE OR FEMALE. LIVING WITH THREE GIRLS YOU MUST BE FEMALE CAUSE YOU COULDN'T BE THAT LUCKY. LOVE YOUR BLOG...KEEP IT UP!
Get a punching bag. Blow up a picture of your flatmate. Stick it on the punching bag. Have at her. Enjoy!
"Yes, every day. And it's spelt 'genius'."
It's SPELLED f-r-e-q-u-e-n-t-l-y...
Every day != frequently
Book material? You gotta be kidding me! This is the basis for a box-office bonanza film!! But maybe like one of those old ones before there were 'talkies' ... :)
J.
This is my first time here.. I got this blog address from Blogspot recent posts list. What attracts me was the “headline”.
I believe the author is a lady. A cute kiwi gal hiding behind her puter. *LOL* She is smiling!
I used to stay with a friend but after few “incidents”, quite similar like yours, I decided to rent my own apartment.
Living by yourself is much more funner! I do not have to worry going in or out bathroom “towelless” – if u understand what that means!
The writing really is good but the pics are awsome. I hope your artist friend is getting paid good money somewhere for there work, I know my work could use an graphic artist like that.
While, I had the pleasure of reading many of your previous posts before you canceled the archives...and I've been following your blog for awhile...
I think it's great that you took down the archives. Store them! Save them!! And when you move out, be one of the first to go from Blog to Book. You and your graphic design buddy could publish the archives and make a mint...
I wish you continued success on this blog...I love it!
Truly,
Insanity Infusion
I liked the other post better. It looks to me like your next post will probably be about what you had for breakfast. ect.
If you are desperate to read this blog's history, you can do a google search for "ihatemyflatmate" and read google's cache.
i love you and your blog regardless of your gender, and generally, i am pretty gender-specific with people i fall in love with.
that aside, i'm still wondering what city you live in. i understand the need to keep yourself anonymous, but I am still convinced you live with my evil former flatmate whose name is Kelley, because really, could it be true that two identical people exist like this on this earth?
I don't know if I told you this story last time I posted a comment, but before Kelley the Evil Bitch moved in we had Lisa the weirdo who couldn't keep a job and Skippy the girl with a boy's name who shit in our bathroom sink. (and the sink is not in the same room as the toilet!)
So, when you feel badly about living with the evil flatmate, just remember, she could've shit in your bathroom sink!
Quote -> "Sadly, I think I'd prefer to live with your flatmate rather than you. This site is an exercise in passive aggresive backstabbing. You're a truly horrible person"
Garth
I think this person really does not understand the value of this blog, as in a situation like yours the other coping technique prolly involves a large knife and hefty prison time. I love that you respond to this frustrating situation with humor rather than bloodletting... though I am sure the other technique has a certain appeal at times. Good luck
That's some funny shit.
your sight is very tee-hee.
i just have one question: what happens when your flatmate comes upon this lovely little gem?
anyway, keep this up...
rather amusing.
never mind, i just realized that you are anonymous.
do you have any other blogs?
Thanks for answering questions. I love your blog! I liked the post in which you get really bad 'dung lung' when you go into the little room after your flatmate. Take care and keep up the hilarious writing! Listen to Warren Zevon's "Splendid Isolation".
JD, I've been following your blog since it boing-boinged.
This coming Valentine, how about doing a "One Thing I love about my Flatmate".
:)
She can't be 100% evil, can she? Maybe 99%.... :) Like they said "Every cloud has its silver lining..... "
Cheers.... (also to your graphic designers... :))
I can totally relate to your blog. I have had more than my fair share of weird roommates over the years. I think its good that you use your blog to get your frustrations out about the situation.
Very well done. And the graphics are great too !
I understand what you're going through. Had the same experience as well. You can always move out, live alone or share an apartment with like-minded people. Life is much better without those little hassles that you have to deal with. Believe me you can do a lot of better things with a clear head and with less time spent fussing over minute but irritable details.
Goodluck!
You sound like a chick, especially since you bitch like one, and you live with 3 other chicks.
Anti-Feminist site
I just was asking between me and myself why I don't start reading (also) english written blogs (I am italian)
I feel very lucky of having started from yours, even if I'm quite sure (or anyway I hope so) that something here is just fiction.
have a lot of fun.
Fantastic blog! I empathize with each of these issues...and I agree that you should publish a book with your designer friend. Stay pissed!
Yo! i found a Blogger Coper!
http://boringoldbloggers.blogspot.com/
yes thats righ, things ihate about blogrs!
Like ur blog, good stuff
But what I generally dont understand is how your graphic designer friend could "create" photographs. If I am not mistaken, photographs are generally taken and then just remastered with a program to add text and stuff like that to make them fit. So in my opinion, if he/she is using images taken by someone else, then he/she should be so kind to share them with us all since we love all the images. But if all these images are captured by him/her, then i bow down to his genius.
BTW, if the author does read this comment, your writing skills are worth a mention even..
this blog is hilarious i don't know if it was meant to be. but it's definately worth my daily readings
Maybe you might wanna Read a series of Japanese Manga called "Crayon Shinchan" and maybe then you'll feel alot fun facing your problem. Just find a blessing in every disguise.... (this is totally silly...and made by a totally sill person, sorry....)
I love your blog. The people who write in complaining that you're bitter, angry or whatever, have obviously never had to live with someone annoying. All of my roomates have been friends, and there are more than one that I just don't speak to anymore after moving out. This is why marriage is in such a bad state, having to live every day with some slob/neat freak/fundamentalist or whatever. Keep up the good work!
what is a flatmate? Is it British for roommate? Such a way we humans have with words...
just born, just entered, just started - what do i see and what do i smell. It’s nearing 4 am, my time-after about 4 months of "thinking", created my blog, became a blogger and the first blog coming on my screen is a "complaint". or whining. (what am i doing now ) and that too about the most "routine" task, termed as "ablutions" is this what a first timer gets . Fuckaroo and a real pisser-in joe "beaver"clarendons profanity- and what is this-a freak cosmic coincidence-literally. i just finished dream catcher by stevie kingie by 3.00 am and the entire byrums (the alien form) incubates, eats (read the novel to know its diet) exists and exits - i wont-rather-cant more interestingly, more hilariously describe the entire incubation and the exit and the process in between(the best part) except the master author himself – (seen movies but reading king for the first time)- but guys u better read that to get the picture –or should I say smell the picture – ethery-sulphury- and here i am having 41 comments on the looniest "loo" habits. yeah i agree , u combine room freshener and crap odour , u don’t need swiss scissors to trim your hair inside your nostrils. on the first place it wouldn’t be there. gross injustice- probably in another 8 hours time. (that is by 12.30 noon) yeah. if you sleep at 4.30 am and i need a strict 8 hours sleep i am bound to do " the act" which if prevented by coercion (somebody else occupying the john - u r room mate taking a bath ? or by nature " termed constipation” right ?-might be a more self induced pain than your room mate :). May be some solution for the ablution problem. 1. as the kingie says make your loo as “the Lamar’s thinking place- I was laughing in long bursts (I mostly read novels in the Lamar’s thinking place) than what bursts out or “burps” out or “flops” out. 2. clipping a big plastic cloth clip on your nose. (please keep two swabs of cotton to soften the pinch). 3 in my opinion the “better-best” solution. Eat lots of stale food thru out the previous day and make more stink-than-her-stink. So long. And remain- long -in - john to effectively counter act.
wow. I don't know how you took my complaints about my roommates out of my head and transcribed them into your blog, but bravo. I don't know if I should laugh or cry at the prospect that there are other people who are suffering in much the same manner as I.
My roommate has been vacuuming right outside my bedroom door for the last 10 minutes. I wouldn't have a complaint if it weren't for the fact that we don't have a carpet.
Yo, are you ever gunna post again?
I have such empathy for you, Flatmate Hater. May I call you FH? Good.
I once had three housemates. I had known one of my housemates for well over a decade, so I thought that sharing a house would be a lovely idea. I was wrong. So very wrong.
Housemate Number 3 would take plates of food into his bedroom, along with forks, knives, spoons, glasses, etc. This wouldn't have been so bad if he ever brought them back out again. It was later discovered that he kept half-eaten plates of food under his bed for months at a time.
As if this wasn't bad enough, it was also discovered that he kept a rather good sized jar in his closet for moments when nature called, but he was unable, or unwilling to open his door and walk two feet to the bathroom.
I would love to say that his filth was the worst part about living with him, but alas, that is not the case. Thankfully, he eventually decided to move, so I did not have to ask him to leave.
I hope your flatmate decides to find another flat soon. My thoughts are with you.
This blog is the shit. I've linked to it on my own blog, which is pretty new, but very popular in this little town that i'm in. I've already gotten a few dozen people hooked..
My only comment is for people who come on to correct spelling. Laugh it off as geeky if you want, but it's a waste of time and space. If you're hung up on grammar and/or spelling, keep it to yourself. No one cares, an i can't imagine the owner of this blog giving much of a damn about your opinion anyway.
I'm a screenprint designer...anyone want a "I HATE MY FLATMATE" T-shirt?
You're next project should be "Things I did to get my flatmate to leave."
I mean, if you're really going for catharsis, actions always speak louder than words.
Suggestions: Fish (dead and hidden), fake stalker, mice (also dead and hidden), removal of bedroom door hinges, booby traps...
Very fun to read. Seems as though there was a tone shift about a week ago. The posts aren't as pointedly venomous as in the beginning - your flatmate discovered the blog about a week ago, right? (Or, the venting is actually working for you and taking your edge off.)
Mark
Thanks for your blog. The news media must be contacting you by now. What will your readers do when you (or she) move out? (The flatmate sounds like a girl to me.)
Regards,
Sarah
http://numanumaguy.blogspot.com
http://marryrich.blogspot.com
kuddos ambiguous character. your blog seems pretty awesome. well, it must be because i only like awesome things. aside from some of your lame ass fans (ie: the ones debating your grammar), i enjoyed reading stuff written on your blog. i bet you get a lot of requests to read the blogs of fans you have. well, i'm going to be no different. read my damn blog. it rules.
http://feedtheasian.blogspot.com
I was wondering whether I should move out of home this year or not - now it's settled. I shall continute scabbing of the folks for as long as it takes for them to physically boot me out the door. Huzzah. Although, I could quite easily post three times a day on my blog about how annoying my Dad is.
Ben
http://thingsivewritten.blogspot.com
A suspicious silence. Has the flatmate found the blog? Or has everything to hate about the flatmate been blogged?
I hope not. It's been hilarious... and the writer has a genuine talent.
Dude...I stumbled onto your Blog and I must admit (like many others I've notices) I'm rather intriguied and excited by your flatmate 'problems'.
Do you really update every day? If so I will certainly bookmark you and be back to read up on the next episode in the saga...is it possible to read back through some of your "favourites" (if you could call them that)...that is some things that you hate about your flatmate that really ticked you off or are of particular note - I would love to read more :)
BOok, film, heck a sitcom/TV series...I don't care...give me more :D
Love your work.
yup
I can see you made it the goal of your life to talk about things you hate about your flatmate!
WE say it's funny ,but we can guess what you are going through.
If I were your flatmate, I'd never leave you!
This blog really does say far more about you than it does your flatmate. Man, do you have serious issues.
Peurile bitter nonsense fabricated by a bored attention seeker.
I can totally relate. I love your blog. The title attracted me, as my roomate at college is a constant source of chatter among my mates. We get along great, but alot of the things you mention also apply. *big smile* BYE
why are you still living with your flatmate if you hate her?
Hi,
Nice work.
Are you american ? are your parents ?
I found this and now am unable to live without! It is a bright spot in my days! I can't wait to hear of the stupid and annoying things she does (although it is sad for you). Your graphic design friend is awe-inspiring.
I had a roommate for 4 months (I didn't choose her...stupid college housing people) and there were those days..."GAAAAHHHHH!!" You wonder how she could be so stupid and moronic...
May you find a way to get rid of her...very soon.
hmmmm...i wonder if you are just making up these stories coz your pictures really match with your stories. and it's hard to ask your graphic designer friend to edit your pictures DAILY OR ALMOST DAILY just to match with your daily story....what do u think bloggers?
Hmm... I'm new in bLoGgErS. I found dis bLog. It's so interesting... :) I like it very much. Not sure whether its real or not, i mean d stories. But sure fun 2 b read.
mine is >
http://fairylicious.blogspot.com/
I'm 100% sure you live with ur mom! or ur daughter! something like that.. :D damn, ur funny!
kss, (pxl)
http://www.stormfront.org/forum/search.php?searchid=1451423
This boy (Odinpatrick) is a neo-nazi
I have found great post about coffee mugs! Look at!
Hey thanks for posting this blog. I was really frustrated with the situation with my flatmate, so I did a Google search & came across yours. After reading all the different comments posted, I'm glad & reassured that I'm not overeacting when it comes to my flatmate. After one year of putting up with her nonsense we have finally given her the walking ticket. She now has 30 days to look for another place but she still walks around the apartment doing what she likes - piling the sink up with dirty dishes, slamming doors,not cleaning up after cooking, talking loudly on the phone etc.I wanted to give her a good verbal bombarding but my other flatmate told me not to as it would only show that she is getting to me. What do you think? Let me know.
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This is a great way to get out the frustration of living with this woman without resorting to desperate measures.
Great page... Even Better pics...I shall continue scabbing of the folks for as long as it takes for them to physically boot me out the door.
Each and every one of these posts has been already been brought up with my flatmate.
All images are created by a friend who is a graphic designer. They too wish to stay anonymous.
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