Mouldy cheese
So I'm in the kitchen while my flatmate is preparing some food for herself.. As I was reaching for a glass I noticed there was some stuff on her cheese she was grating. "Hey, what's that? Is that mould?" "Yeah, of course it is, cheese is suppose to have mould on it" she replied in a ever so knowing way while wobbling her head. "Yes, some cheese do, but not cheddar, right? I don't think that mould there has been cultured in a cheese factory". But there was no point arguing with her. Besides, she could do with some more protein in her diet, even if it was coated on large qualtities of fat. And hopefully it would make her sick.
posted at 04:01
41 Comments:
Excellent job. I really like your blog.
Wow, I had a bad roommate. Now I don't. I woke up to find the shitty one moving out one morning and it was the best morning I had had in six months. I hope you get a morning like that. In the meantime, maybe you should actually say some of what you think when she pisses you off.
Well for your sake I really hope your flatmate does not get sick. I mean if she does the mess will prolly get worse along with the smell. If she is sick, I mean as little as she cares now about the environment she lives in she will care even less. Prolly he hygiene will go out the window as well. I feel your pain witht eh horrible roomie thing though. At least she's not always doing drugs and not paying the bills.
Could I possibly join your club? If there isn't a club, would you possibily consider starting one??
My roommate is starting to bug me in various unspecified ways. I dread going into the kitchen to find her unrised dishes in the dishwasher, her open food containers in the refrigerator and the toilet that still has remenants of her meal from yesterday. This and more!
So I am preparing some mac and cheese, and my roommate (who has this blog about me also), comes and wrinkles his nose at my cheese, bitching about the molds.
*Sigh* Who will explain to him that cheese is supposed to be moldy. He probably thought it was cheddar cheese, the retarded moron, but it wasn't.
I don’t know you and I don’t know your situation but I can’t help to think that this is a terribly unhealthy and uneffective way to deal with your problems. Could you not think of a more imaginative way to vent your frustrations, an actual solution rather than pouring all this hate and anger into the world? Why don’t you move out? .
I hope your roommate gets food poisoning. Maybe then she'd clean up her act.
I've been reading several of the comments you've recieved and it annoys me how many times people suggest that you talk to your roommates about what they do, even though you've explained many times that you DO confront them and they still pull the same crap. Oh well.
http://piratesandotherthings.blogspot.com
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Why don't you just move out since your flatmate is giving so much trouble?
Living with these kind of people under a roof is going to give you mental problem. I am not very clear about the whole situation but from your side of story, your flatmate is a gross person. Yucks!
That has to be one of the most ignorant and disguisting things I have ever heard.
By any chance, are you Australian?
Cheese is supposed to have mould in it? Ewh.
Anyway, great job in making your flatmate have a sickening life. Very evil and evil is cool. ^^
A number of years ago i discovered my flatmate washing a colander he'd previously used to sieve turds and "clumps"out of the cat litter tray alongside the cutlery and crockery from supper while simultaneously pissing in the sink down the gap at the side of the bowl (which,incidentally, was clothed in a dense patina of chipfat enhanced by the lukewarm water he insisted on using). When i gently drew his attention to the dubious hygiene of these diverse processes while commending him for efficient multi-tasking he upbraided me for "shaming" him and said i was repressed. Eventually we parted ways after a dispute over communal methadone.In short,i got a script and he didn't and the resultant power difference led to incompatibility. Keep writing - its zeitgeist-tastic
Just found this site - would be funnier if it didn't hit so close to home and bring back so many of my own flatmate memories! How about this: does your flatmate blow his/her nose in the shower and then leave the hork (sp???) on the shower curtain for the rest of us to entertain ourselves with during our own bathing??? And that just happened yesterday. Fun stuff.
P.S. Nick Mercer, whoever you are, that is one damn funny posting.
TOMMORROW'S POST:
MY FLATMATE THREW UP HER MOLDY CHEESE ALL OVER THE PLACE. (And then didn't clean it up.)
Just wanted to say that I stumbled across your blog yesterday and liked it so much that I immediately put a link to it on mine. As you can guess, I have a flatmate from hell too, and the cheese thing especially is just so her. I don't think I've ever seen her eat anything *not* containing cheese, and there are usually about four or five varieties in our fridge, in various states of furry, moudly decomposition and stinkiness. And that's just the tip of the iceberg. The problem is that apart from being a complete slob, she's actually a really nice person and easy to get along with, so it's not obvious how to broach it with her without causing offence. And she's older than the rest of us in the flat, too, she's in her 30s!! You'd think she'd be sick of living in filth by now!
Anyway, keep it up, this is fantastic. Like group therapy or something. :)
You should take a look at these guys
http://departmentofhate.blogspot.com
It's more than a flatmate they've issues with!
Don't you get the runs after eating moldy cheese?
Utt Ohh. The smelly bathroom problem is occurring again. Probably right now. (Groans and noises from behind the bathroom door.)
And then there is "stuff" all over the toilet seat and toilet bowl walls to deal with.
"Clean up after yourself," you might say to her.
"But I was SICK," she'll say. The implication = YOU are a hard-hearted bitch.
Yeah, that's just sick.
hilarious... i wonder why i didn't think of this myself! now, it's too late, i just moved out a week ago...
maybe next time.
-sx
ok... let me tell you something about Cheese. I know Cheese. Cheese and I have an almost intimate relationship... it's that way with my whole family. Often, we call ourselves the Family of Cheese, or the Cheesy Family. We call our home the House of Cheese. My mother is the Mother of Cheese. Together, we have cheesy fun times.
I'll have you know that mold on Cheese is not a problem; it's part of the aging process. It adds flavor, texture and a nice aroma to almost any Cheese, including Cheddar (always capitalize the Cheddar since it is Beddar)... but you're not supposed to eat the mold. You have to cut the mold off to reveal the Cheesy goodness beneath. Eating the mold will make you sick. Eating tha Cheeze (see how I changed the spelling there a little bit, such is the essence of Cheesy fun.) will make you happy and healthy and strong, unless you're lactose intolerant. Then I have pity on your soul.
Cheers and Cheese to everybody!
Weyrwoman
You are right - why do ppl put comments critising this blog and blogger? I think this blog is great - and its here to amuse the readers (as well as obviously to 'pour all this hate and anger in to the world'!)
This is what we call the process of Natural Selection. Your flatmate will get sick and die, and will henceforth be unable to pollute the gene pool.
Oh wat a fine thing to blog abt:) really enjoyed ur roommate-(poor she)'s stories!
:)
i've been reading your blog here and there for some time now, and i must say its great. never stop writing. i don't knwo what i would do if you did stop. where would i go?
Seeing your reluctance to move out or throw your flatmate out, I was wondering whether you are staying with your sister?
your blog is great. keep writing. ohh just a question, where do you get your pictures?
If she does get sick from the mold and throws up, it can give you something else to be pissed off about... I can see it now - throw up all over the bathroom. Adds a new "scent" to the mix...
http://www.klofas.com/png/mold.png
I found this URL while doing research for a biology project - the link to it was called "My roommate's fridge."
I'm sure you may have answered this somewhere before, but why don't you just move out? Afraid of running out of material?
The little informative posters that you have on your blogs are absolute gems!
Perchance, were they done by SuperFlyWebPimp?
Love the 40's feel to it.
Now to your stuff.
IT'S GOOD! LOVE THE HATE!
In-freaking-credible shit. I absorbed of it with great relish-
-wait, that came out wrong...
Good humor,
reminds me of the blog..things I wish I had
www.frankenweinie.blogspot.com
It seems that you realize how entertaining your blog is and that's why you stay in your current situation. Please realize that your roomate will never change even if confronted by you and that the only way to solve the problem is to move out.
That being said, I suggest you stay.
I was wondering the other day how i would present the concept of "expiration dates" to an African: "you know, we have so much food in our fridge that we have to write dates on it in order to remember when to throw it away..."
I now wonder what kind of face would greet such an explanation...
I went to a alleged counterpart website whose owner said you were his roomate (?). I went there and signed in with a fake name and email and told him about my blog to lure him away. Your blog is funny.
Shhhh!!!! Don't bring her attention to the mold. Maybe she'll eat it and then die. Then all your problems would be solved.
Try this rant:
http://rogerramjetrants.blogspot.com/
The rest of the complaints, sure, those I can understand. This one, ok, it's not healthy, but what business is it of yours what she eats? At least she's eating it and not leaving it in the fridge for you to bitch about.
EWWWWWWWWWWW!!! Maybe you could suggest to look at the expiration date on all dairy products! EWW i can't believe she ate mold on cheddar cheese.. thats so gross.
Just because your flatmate wants to sit and watch "caught by the bell" everyday doesn't mean that you have to say that the shows are meaning less to her, maybe she likes them. You should get another tv for your own use.
I saw this site and really just wanted to vent some frustrasion myself.
I live with eight people currently not out of choice and used to have a mortagage. My situation is temporary, but sharing is proving to be intolerable. These people are a mixture of ages and cultural backgrounds and so have different habits and customs from one another I am trying to get used to.
I am the cleanest and was raised to be that way. But I am continually cleaning up after others as well as the one taking the rubbish out each week and there are usually twenty bags in total, providing bin bags, cleaning products, washing up their dishes etc because when I haven't replaced it before, no one will buy anything for weeks and have had to mention it a few times to those who live here but who do nothing at all to contribute to the household purchases.
They literally treat it as if it were a dumping ground for all kinds of shit and now I am starting to get frustrated and angry. I have told my landlord who is a lovley guy but haven't told him the full extent of the problem because I don't want to turn it into a really huge issue and to dump the issues onto him - I doubt if he would truly beleive the things that go on here. Though I am amazed at just how filthy they all are.
There is a couple above me who often brings around their friends who show no respect for other's pivacy and treat it like a whore-house and are having loud sex upstairs I really have to go out as don't want to listen to it. I think that they are promiscous which I am catholic and into monogamy and so I get really agitated by their beleifs too. There are usually four involved including the girl oppossitte me (moral values lack)and I have been propositioned by one of the regular men that comes to see these girls. It is too disgusting to mention really but just adds to the whole problem. They bring these friends around on a constant basis so I am always feeling invaded.
They are by far the worst and the guy often walks around naked minus a pair of boxers driniking tons of alchahol I have to throw away the cans he doesn't. He is always asking me to lend money to him and once lent money to both girls I never got back so never lent any more again.
Then there is this other couple (lithuanian) who are very pleasant people but are very untidy and leave their dishes also in the sink for days and just can't be bothered to clean after themselves and the guy (boyfriend) puts his music full volume in his car whilst stationed in the drive way. They also argue a lot.
Then there is the girl oppossite again who never cleans the bathroom after herself and there is dirt coming from the plug hole that never appears when I have a shower. She is also self-righteous and thinks I am mad because I am too clean a person. We have had conflicts about my cleanliness and once with the landlord who had to come and defend me knowing that I wasn't mad and making it up. She also throws away cleaning products.
Then there is Another lodger I get on very well with told the landlord recently that I complain about everyone to him and so now I am afraid that he is on their side but he is a kind of hippy-type people lover who wants to be nice and kind to everyone like I do, but he is just too sweet natured about the disgusting mess these people create - because he is also guilty of leaving his dishes and pans for days and his work boots all over the house. He sometimes uses the house as a recording studio from time to time and have never complained to him even when I have heard a woman yelling in her song from the kitchen in the past. I have never complained to him about anyone until very recently so was suprised that he said this to my landlord I have a great rapport with.
I am truly not exaggerating the situation and do have a life (I am into my psychology degree and work part time) and don't have a habit of making stuff up and this is a real problem that the landlord would need to be here on a continual basis to see this all for himself. I sometimes feel like recording everything with a videocamera but that would be breaking the law so wouldn't do it of course, but any suggesstions?
Dude, use a spellchecker.
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