PV=nRT, dickhead.
Albert Einstein is regarded widely as a genius. I never met the man, and cannot say for sure whether or not he was, in fact, a genius.
One thing I do know for sure about Einstein: he is famous for is inventing the refrigerator. He and one of his students, Leó Szilárd, were awarded a US patent in 1930. The genius behind this version of the 'fridge is that it has no moving parts.
Some would say that Einstein's genius lay in the way he could understand something quite abstract (like, say: thermodynamics) and express it in a very simple way. The Einstein refrigerator requires no pump. You open the door, put in or pull out the comestibles you require and then close the door. It is so simple. Just like E=mc2. Even a quailtard can understand it.
This afternoon I went into the kitchen and discovered that the 'fridge door was open. It looked closed, that is true, but I could see the telltale glow of the internal light escaping around the seal. Clear proof that the last person to use it has absolutely no regard for all the hard work of Leó and Albert, someone who scoffs at the first law of thermodynamics. Or perhaps the deliberate work of some adiabatic saboteur.
Now this is a terrible thing. Obviously some people are irreversibly stupid and careless. Some people may not have the best hand eye co-ordination. Some people just don't give a shit. Wherever I roam across this globe I find people of such insoluble and concentrated idiocy and simple-mindedness that I sincerely pray for some mild apocalypse. A bit of chlorine in the gene pool. But not closing a 'fridge door? Seriously... the central heating was on. I could hear the ghost of Lord Kelvin boyling with rage.
The thing is, a 'fridge is a very large white object. It is present in most kitchens in the civilised western hemisphere. People are familiar with them. What aggravates me is that most people have no fucking clue how they work, therefore no idea why you plug them into the fucking wall, therefore, no real idea how much electricity they use, or how hard it is for the ammonia phase-change to physically pump heat out of the fridge. Therefore, how important it is to make sure the fucking door is shut. For Christ's sake, I used to own a dog that could open the door, steal my gourmet sausages and close the bloody door again. He left the door open the first time, and received a flogging. Rather than cease his culinary kleptomania he just shut the door from then on. Good dog.
Today's reason I am infuriated by one of the retards I live with: Such intellectual luminaries as Nicolas Léonard Sadi Carnot laboured for years to understand thermodynamics so we could have fridges. Einstein himself invented an ingenious refrigerator. Scientists have provided us with the gift of cool. The world is gradually heating up killing all the fucking dolphins and polar bears and whatever just so we can keep our milk at 4 degrees Celsius and some stupid FUCKTARD with less brains than a German Shepard LEAVES THE FUCKING DOOR OPEN!
One thing I do know for sure about Einstein: he is famous for is inventing the refrigerator. He and one of his students, Leó Szilárd, were awarded a US patent in 1930. The genius behind this version of the 'fridge is that it has no moving parts.
Some would say that Einstein's genius lay in the way he could understand something quite abstract (like, say: thermodynamics) and express it in a very simple way. The Einstein refrigerator requires no pump. You open the door, put in or pull out the comestibles you require and then close the door. It is so simple. Just like E=mc2. Even a quailtard can understand it.
This afternoon I went into the kitchen and discovered that the 'fridge door was open. It looked closed, that is true, but I could see the telltale glow of the internal light escaping around the seal. Clear proof that the last person to use it has absolutely no regard for all the hard work of Leó and Albert, someone who scoffs at the first law of thermodynamics. Or perhaps the deliberate work of some adiabatic saboteur.
Now this is a terrible thing. Obviously some people are irreversibly stupid and careless. Some people may not have the best hand eye co-ordination. Some people just don't give a shit. Wherever I roam across this globe I find people of such insoluble and concentrated idiocy and simple-mindedness that I sincerely pray for some mild apocalypse. A bit of chlorine in the gene pool. But not closing a 'fridge door? Seriously... the central heating was on. I could hear the ghost of Lord Kelvin boyling with rage.
The thing is, a 'fridge is a very large white object. It is present in most kitchens in the civilised western hemisphere. People are familiar with them. What aggravates me is that most people have no fucking clue how they work, therefore no idea why you plug them into the fucking wall, therefore, no real idea how much electricity they use, or how hard it is for the ammonia phase-change to physically pump heat out of the fridge. Therefore, how important it is to make sure the fucking door is shut. For Christ's sake, I used to own a dog that could open the door, steal my gourmet sausages and close the bloody door again. He left the door open the first time, and received a flogging. Rather than cease his culinary kleptomania he just shut the door from then on. Good dog.
Today's reason I am infuriated by one of the retards I live with: Such intellectual luminaries as Nicolas Léonard Sadi Carnot laboured for years to understand thermodynamics so we could have fridges. Einstein himself invented an ingenious refrigerator. Scientists have provided us with the gift of cool. The world is gradually heating up killing all the fucking dolphins and polar bears and whatever just so we can keep our milk at 4 degrees Celsius and some stupid FUCKTARD with less brains than a German Shepard LEAVES THE FUCKING DOOR OPEN!
posted at 13:37
20 Comments:
But if all the fucktards in the world disappeared, what would you then be able to compare yourself to in order to ensure your superiority?
Whoever you are, "random," you wouldn't know because you wouldn't be around to find out in the scenario you describe.
We once had a cat who knew how to open the fridge door. He never bothered to shut it either. Not even after having been flogged a time or two. Instead of leaving the scene of the crime - he'd just sit down in front of the fridge until someone came in - with this incredible 'go fuck yourself' look on his face.
We ended up putting a lock on it. Aside from the sausage thievery - he was definitely a cool cat.
(same went for the bread box. he loved baked goods)
My GOD you have bad luck with flatmates. But the fridge thing happens to the best of us, you're in a hurry, you push the door, it looks like it shuts, but its open a little crack. 5 minutes later you hear "BEEP! BEEEP!". Thank god for the fridges that beep.
Of course then you have the people that get their milk put it back in and walk away expecting the fridge door to close on its own. Some do, but sometimes they don't shut properly. Idiots.
I bet if you added a small container of cottage cheese to the milk, it would gross the offending party out enough that they wouldn't leave the fridge open again.
Like you've never done it!
For fuck's sake, are you the only person on this dreary Earth that has never, ever, ever, ever left a fridge door open, thinking you'd shut it, but unfortunately the momentum of door volocity versus the push didn't QUITE get the door to seal? And perhaps you were momentarily distracted to double check, because you were in the middle of sticking pins into your voodoo doll or flying around on your fucking broomstick around the kitchen?
You're running out of adequate ranting material. Fast.
Try bolting it shut. That'll learn em.
Like you've never done it!
For fuck's sake, are you the only person on this dreary Earth that has never, ever, ever, ever left a fridge door open, thinking you'd shut it, but unfortunately the momentum of door volocity versus the push didn't QUITE get the door to seal? And perhaps you were momentarily distracted to double check, because you were in the middle of sticking pins into your voodoo doll or flying around on your facking broomstick around the kitchen?
You're running out of adequate ranting material. Fast.
This "peas on Toast" is a shitbag yes?
Surely you have a specific target flatmate in mind. All this nebulous blame-pointing isn't helping us faithful readers to concentrate our hatred and loathing at one particular ratbag.
Therefore, if you wish for your readers to perform voodoo ceremonies on a specific person on your behalf, please name the fucker.
Yours,
Adalmin
PS "Peas On Toast" is a complete hypocrite who despite professing revilement towards your writing chooses to come here and read said writing AND leave a nice pertinent remark, with the word "facking", too. How can you not love a guy who is still so ruffled in the petticoats that he actually uses "facking"? For crying out loud.
oh man, that stinks. probably literally. ha! while this is irritating, i myself think that there are worse things flatmates can do w/fridges. these include: hogging all the space, leaving stuff to rot in it, buying 5 dozen eggs for no apparent reason, eating all of your food stored there, and moving your stuff around. count your blessings.
my obnoctious roommate, Bigfoot, has done all of these things. Plus, as an extra-added bonus, he has to touch everything with his dirty dirty hands. i have never seen him wash his hands. not once. it's disgusting.
Some people just aren't cut out for living with flatmates. I, for one, am at the top of that list. I have realized after many long years of living with people sadly affected with dipshit retard dumbass moron asshole syndrome, that I would rather spend half my income on a nice place, live alone, and be happy.
((2xChemistry)+(1xPhysics))/Bitch = Beautiful Post
The fact that in *real* life, it could actually have been our favourite anonymous blogger that may have done this heinous act him/herself and just not realised it seems to have gone unnoticed.
But no, we musn't forget, Peas on Toast, that fans of this site are perfect in every way and would never do anything so inferior as to accidentally not quite shut the fridge door.
And if they did, they'd surely notice and shut it pronto and blame the flatmates for having broken the fridge-door-shutting-mechanism in the first place.
It's a fairly trivial manner to adust the threaded feet on the bottom of the fridge to enable it to self-close.
This entails setting the back of the fridge lower than the front, and the hinge side higher than the handle side. I leave the specifics as an exercise for the student.
Ammonia phase-changer? Electricity?
If your fridge uses electricity then it will be powered like an air conditioning system via a condeser (e.g. moving parts). Ammonia-cooled refrigerators usually use butane or propane gas; generally for areas without electricity, e.g. when camping or whatever.
Get a life, you morons. There's more to life than complaining about a flatmate. Kick him out, fix your fridge, adjust the feet, and find something useful to do.
The beauty of google and how irrelevant search results can be.
What a lovely little rant.
i completely agree with what "sex" said.....
I have realized after many long years of living with people sadly affected with dipshit retard dumbass moron asshole syndrome, that I would rather spend half my income on a nice place, live alone, and be happy.
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