Dirty floor
After eating breakfast on saturday morning, the kitchen was swept and cleaned. The kitchen was not used again by us until sunday morning breakfast, but the floor was dirty again with crumbs and pieces of food all over the floor.
So today's reason my flat mate pisses me off;
Making a mess in the kitchen and not cleaning it up.
So today's reason my flat mate pisses me off;
Making a mess in the kitchen and not cleaning it up.
posted at 22:22
6 Comments:
Have you thought about putting small, but ever increasing, dosages of a reasonably addictive downer in a food of high fat concentration. After a month of weening her on to the drug, she will be addicted. You can then maintain that dosage for another month. At this stage she will be pretty hooked, now you have two options:
1. You can immediately withdraw the tampering substance and watch her cold turkey (climbing walls, hopefully even a bit of projectile vomit)
2. Reduce it in steps, at a faster rate than you built it up She will then need to eat increasing amounts of the food in order to get her daily "fix". If you chose the right food, sit back and watch her stack on the pounds!
Happy poisening!
Anon
(not my real name)
Thanks for the advice, they are some good suggestions, however with the slight drawback that she has a hefty stack of pounds already! I guess it will just have to be cold turkey.
I thought she already sounded pretty fat for some reason. That is a shame, there are few things in this world that are better than watching someone feed their addiction to downers and really stack it on at the same time.
What about putting the drug in something that will cause her some serious discomfort. Two options:
1. High fibre foods (laxative affect)
2. A clogger (not my area of expertise, but I am sure you could research a food-stuff)
Both will result in some serious toilet time, but the latter has the advantage of haemorrhoids.
Happy hurtin'!
Anon
(not my real name)
You people are savages.
No - what you need to do is shit into her mouth as she sleeps. Try and get her during REM. And before you do it whisper in her ear that the fudge fairy is here to feed her beautiful fudge.
You mention in a later post in this blog that your flatmate really "could use some protein coated in fat," which I took to mean she was too thin. Now I see here in this earlier post you claim she has extra pounds. Which one is it?
By the way... Is poisoning ever a good idea? You may have a problem with a rude flatmate, but the anonymous coward who suggested you poison her is a sociopath.
I accidentally came across this blog, which is not only about your flatmate but mine. Fortunately, he won't be in my life for long - he recently sent me a text message to say that he was giving up the lease on this flat. I only moved in April, and now I am having to move again - it's September!
Post a Comment
<< Home